SCREEN IT! PARENTAL REVIEW: DR. SEUSS' THE CAT IN THE HAT

"DR. SEUSS' THE CAT IN THE HAT"
(2003) (Mike Myers, Dakota Fanning) (PG)

Alcohol/ Drugs	Blood/Gore	Disrespectful/ Bad Attitude	Frightening/ Tense Scenes	Guns/ Weapons
Mild	Minor	Heavy	*Mild	None

Imitative Behavior	Jump Scenes	Music (Scary/Tense)	Music (Inappropriate)	Profanity
Heavy	Minor	Mild	None	*None

Sex/ Nudity	Smoking	Tense Family Scenes	Topics To Talk About	Violence
Mild	*None	Mild	Mild	Mild

QUICK TAKE:: Children's: A mischievous talking cat infiltrates the lives of a brother and sister in this live-action adaptation of Dr. Seuss' beloved tale.

PLOT:

Jean Walden (KELLY PRESTON) is a realtor who works for the "germophobic" Mr. Humberfloob (SEAN HAYES). When it's announced that a party will be held at her house, Jean panics. That's because her boss will fire her if her place is unkempt. She also knows that her son, Conrad (SPENCER BRESLIN) -- despite the best intentions of his fastidious and orderly sister, Sally (DAKOTA FANNING) -- will inevitably make the place a mess.

Thus, she panics when Humberfloob calls her back into work as she's trying to get their home ready. After briefly chatting with her boyfriend, next-door neighbor Lawrence Quinn (ALEC BALDWIN) who wants to send Conrad to military school, she gets Mrs. Kwan (AMY HILL) to baby-sit.

When the perpetually sleepy Kwan doses off, the kids hear a noise in the closet and are shocked to discover a 6-foot tall, talking feline known as The Cat in the Hat (MIKE MYERS). He doesn't think they're any fun and thus wants them to sign a contract where they can have all of the fun they want without getting into any trouble.

Conrad is ready to sign on the dotted line, but Sally - along with the now talkative pet Fish (voice of SEAN HAYES) - think that's not a good idea, but the Cat convinces her. Soon mischievous twins Thing 1 and Thing 2 arrive and things rapidly spiral out of control.

With the house a mess and the pet dog gone, Sally and Conrad do what they can to clean things up, get the dog back and avoid Lawrence, all before their mom gets home and The Cat and the two Things progressively make things worse.

WILL KIDS WANT TO SEE IT?: It's a good bet many younger kids will want to see it.

WHY THE MPAA RATED IT: PG: For mild crude humor and some double-entendres.

CAST AS ROLE MODELS:: MIKE MYERS plays the boisterous and mischievous talking cat who wants the kids to have fun and ends up wrecking much of their house before finally getting things back in order.
SPENCER BRESLIN plays a boy who makes a habit of messing up his mom's house until he learns his lesson from the Cat.
DAKOTA FANNING plays his sister, a type-A "control freak" who reluctantly joins in on the boisterous fun with him and the Cat.
KELLY PRESTON plays their harried single mom who's a realtor concerned about her boss firing her for having a messy house.
ALEC BALDWIN plays her boyfriend, the next door neighbor who doesn't like Conrad and is really living a lie.
SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; SPENCER BRESLIN plays a boy who makes a habit of messing up his mom's house until he learns his lesson from the Cat.
DAKOTA FANNING plays his sister, a type-A "control freak" who reluctantly joins in on the boisterous fun with him and the Cat.
KELLY PRESTON plays their harried single mom who's a realtor concerned about her boss firing her for having a messy house.
ALEC BALDWIN plays her boyfriend, the next door neighbor who doesn't like Conrad and is really living a lie.
SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; DAKOTA FANNING plays his sister, a type-A "control freak" who reluctantly joins in on the boisterous fun with him and the Cat.
KELLY PRESTON plays their harried single mom who's a realtor concerned about her boss firing her for having a messy house.
ALEC BALDWIN plays her boyfriend, the next door neighbor who doesn't like Conrad and is really living a lie.
SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; KELLY PRESTON plays their harried single mom who's a realtor concerned about her boss firing her for having a messy house.
ALEC BALDWIN plays her boyfriend, the next door neighbor who doesn't like Conrad and is really living a lie.
SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; ALEC BALDWIN plays her boyfriend, the next door neighbor who doesn't like Conrad and is really living a lie.
SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; SEAN HAYES plays Jean's "germophobic" boss who fires people for shaking his hand. He also voices the pet fish who's the voice of reason and restraint.
AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.; AMY HILL plays the seemingly narcoleptic babysitter who's supposed to watching the kids.

CAST, CREW, & TECHNICAL INFO

HOW OTHERS RATED THIS MOVIE

Curious if this title is entertaining, any good, and/or has any artistic merit?
Then read OUR TAKE of this film.

(Note: The "Our Take" review of this title examines the film's artistic merits and does not take into account any of the possibly objectionable material listed below).

OUR WORD TO PARENTS:

The following is a brief summary of the content found in this kids comedy flick that's been rated PG. While no complete profanity is present, several expletives are partially said or referenced and various colorful phrases are uttered.

Some cleavage is observed, while some brief, non-explicit sexually related talk occurs. The Cat looks at a photo of the mom as if it's a centerfold (with a related erection-like reference) and some artificial items are made to look like body parts (including part of a man's "butt crack").

Most of the violence on hand is played for laughs and includes kids mistaking the Cat for a piñata; some property damage; a cat tail accidentally being hacked off (no blood), and some punching and hitting.

Various forms of imitative behavior are present, while some characters have varying degrees of bad attitudes. A few, brief moments might be a little unnerving or suspenseful to some younger kids, but older ones won't have any problem with the material. Some crude humor is present, some references are made to smoking and drinking, and some beer and a tropical drink are briefly seen.

Should you still be concerned about the film's appropriateness for yourself or anyone else in your home, you may want to look more closely at our detailed listings for more specific information regarding the film's content.

ALCOHOL OR DRUG USE: The Cat comments on not having a drink.
A comment is made about what sounded like drunken clowns.
We see Lawrence carrying a six-pack of beer and later see some empties on a table near him.
The Cat has a tropical drink.

BLOOD/GORE: The Cat says that milk "gums up the works" (his intestines).
The Cat coughs up a large, wet hairball.
The Cat mentions that a talking fish "drinks where he pees."
Lawrence undoes his girdle and his big belly flops out (that evoked "ews" from our young audience).
Lawrence picks his nose (we don't see anything come out) and then his bellybutton.
We see the family dog lifting its leg to pee on a fire hydrant, but we don't see anything else. Later, however, we see the dog's urine stream hitting the front seat of Lawrence's car.
We see the Cat holding a "barf bag" up to his mouth and hear related sounds as he uses it while Conrad drives his car.
During some wild car moments, the Fish states that he thinks he "wet my jar."
We see the Cat holding a "barf bag" up to his mouth in a photo.
While covered in sticky, purple goo, Lawrence sneezes into his hands and then long strings of mucous and that purple stuff stretch from his face as he removes his hands.

DISRESPECTFUL/BAD ATTITUDE: Jean's boss is a "germophobe" who fires people if they shake his hand or have unkempt homes.
Conrad makes a mess of his house for his own enjoyment.
Lawrence tells Conrad that he doesn't like him (the feeling is mutual) and wants to send him to military school so that he's out of the picture and out of Lawrence's way of getting Jean to marry him.
Mrs. Kwan is somewhat stereotypically portrayed as a loud Asian woman who then falls asleep while she's supposed to be babysitting.
Upset with his mom, Conrad says, "I wish I had a different mom" and she replies that sometimes she wishes the same thing.
We see that Lawrence has been living a lie and lying to Jean about his real self.
The Cat mentions murder as an option (of dealing with the missing family dog) as well as being on a search and destroy (rather than rescue) mission for the pooch.

FRIGHTENING SCENES: Little kids might be unnerved by some of the following, but older ones likely won't be.
We briefly see a pair of clawed feet on the stairs (as some suspenseful music plays), but it turns out to be Conrad wearing clawed slippers.
Conrad and Sally hear a noise coming from the closet and slowly go to investigate (as some suspenseful music plays). He's then suddenly yanked inside and Sally looks scared. A stuffed animal then suddenly flies out and we see that Conrad was just joking around. The Cat then suddenly shows up, however, and scares the kids, who think he's a monster (although to viewers he's acting funny and irreverent).
A purple tornado comes out of a large crate and sucks Sally up into it as Conrad tries to hold onto her hand and lock the crate. He has to let go of her to do the latter and she's briefly sucked up toward the ceiling, but he gets the lock on, the tornado disappears, and he catches her as she falls.

GUNS/WEAPONS: None.

IMITATIVE BEHAVIOR: Phrases: "Dude," "You snot-nosed son of a...wonderful woman (how Lawrence gets around not calling Conrad an "SOB" when Jean walks in), "That guy's a total phony," "Control freak," "That was wicked cool," "Let's get the party started," what sounded like "Judas Priest," "Nobody likes a suck-up," "Bloody," "You're not just wrong, your stupid and ugly like your mom," "Oh my cod," "Shrimpo," "You dirty hoe" (what the Cat says to a hoe, but the word play is on "ho" for "whore"), "Get out of my way you hippy freak," an incomplete "What the..." "I'm such an idiot," "Not so fast you little maggots" and "The mother of all messes."
Conrad pours food and the contents of drawers onto the floor while preparing a costume made of such items (that includes stuffing a loaf of bread down the front of his pants). He then does the "indoors stairs luge" where he rides something down the inside stairs. He then flies out the door and slams into a car (but is otherwise okay).
Conrad licks his palm and then tries to wipe it on Sally, prompting her to slap his arm.
The Cat surfs down the stairs on a serving cart top.
The Cat lets out a loud belch.
Conrad and the Cat jump up and down on the sofa, while the kids and Jean do that at the very end of the film.
Lawrence lets out a loud belch.
The Cat scratches his butt (and other parts of his hairy body to stir up Lawrence's cat allergies).
The Cat snaps his fingers and moves his head like a stereotypical hip "sista."
One of the Things kicks plates out into the room where they shatter.
The Things use the family dog as a football and throw him out the window.
Lawrence picks his nose (we don't see anything come out) and then his bellybutton.
The Cat is dressed like a Rastafarian with long dreadlocks and multiples piercings in his face.
After seeing a toilet with flames coming out of it in an alternate universe, the Cat states, "Something like that really burns my a..." (but doesn't complete "ass").

JUMP SCENES: A stuffed animal suddenly flies out of a closet at Sally (that might startle younger viewers).

MUSIC (SCARY/TENSE): A mild amount of suspenseful music plays in the film.

MUSIC (INAPPROPRIATE): None.

PROFANITY: None, but there's a bleeped out S.O.B. and an incomplete "What the..." and "ass." The Cat also mentions an acronym for his car that comes out to "S-L-O-W" and mentions that's better than when it stood for something else that had the "s" word as the acronym (he doesn't say that, but we infer it from the first letters of the four words he says).

SEX/NUDITY: Jean shows a little cleavage several times in her somewhat low-cut dress.
When the kids ask where the Cat came from, he starts to explain by saying "When a mother cat and daddy cat love each other very much, they..." but Conrad interrupts him from continuing.
The Cat spots a picture of Jean and wonders who she is as he expands it out to look like a centerfold (we see it from behind). As he does that, his hat expands upward, while his tail stiffens and partially lifts up (presumably an erection joke). He's then told she's their mom and that stops.
The Cat is dressed like Carmen Miranda and has pieces of fruit representing "her" breasts and rear end (nothing explicit).
We see the Cat dressed like a redneck mechanic that includes an artificial "butt crack" as he bends over and his pants ride low on his butt.
The Cat briefly passes through a large party where there's dancing and then stops and returns to an attractive and shapely young woman wearing a very small top.
Jean shows more cleavage in a party dress (that has a bare back).

SMOKING: None, but when Sally asks her mom for a rule for her, Jean tells her "No chewing tobacco." Later, the Cat jokes to Sally that she's still smoking way too many cigars (but she does neither).

TENSE FAMILY SCENES: We hear that Conrad and Sally don't have a father (we don't know why).
Upset with his mom, Conrad says, "I wish I had a different mom" and she replies that sometimes she wishes the same thing.

TOPICS TO TALK ABOUT: People who are phobic about germs.
We hear that Conrad and Sally don't have a father (we don't know why).
Mrs. Kwan is somewhat stereotypically portrayed as a loud Asian woman who then falls asleep while she's supposed to be babysitting.
The Cat mentions murder as an option (of dealing with the missing family dog) as well as being on a search and destroy (rather than rescue) mission for the pooch.

VIOLENCE: Conrad does the "indoors stairs luge" where he rides something down the inside stairs. He then flies out the door and slams into a car (but is otherwise okay).
We see TV footage of a man tackling another man in the Taiwanese Parliament and then hear sounds of more hitting.
Conrad licks his palm and then tries to wipe it on Sally, prompting her to slap his arm.
The Cat's tail hits Sally and knocks her back onto a sofa.
Bull horns smash through a door that the Cat has just closed.
We hear the sound of the Cat punching an elephant inside a sofa (we only see its trunk sticking out).
The Cat throws the Fish into the toilet (but doesn't flush).
A version of the Cat doing a TV infomercial accidentally hacks off the end of his own tail with a large cleaver (no blood and played for laughs).
The Cat's tail knocks Conrad across the room.
One of the Things kicks plates out into the room where they shatter.
The Things ride the unconscious babysitter down the steps with her head bouncing on each step.
The Cat hides at a birthday party and poses as a piñata. The kids then come out and whack him with bats, followed by one kid who smashes him in the crotch with a large wooden bat (briefly prompting the Cat to imagine his resultant self as a girly female). Sally and Conrad then have to stop him from hitting that boy (who doesn't see him) with that same bat.
The Cat's car crashes off camera (we see the wreckage), but neither he nor Sally or Conrad is hurt.
Lawrence falls a long distance into a body of water far below him in an alternate universe (but is okay).
When an alternate reality is dispersed, Jean's house reacts by falling apart and looks like a complete wreck.

Reviewed November 18, 2003 / Posted November 21, 2003

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