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Tell Others About This Page By Using This Button "G.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA" (2009) (Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans) (PG-13) Alcohol/ Drugs Blood/Gore Disrespectful/ Bad Attitude Frightening/ Tense Scenes Guns/ Weapons Minor Heavy Extreme Moderate Extreme Imitative Behavior Jump Scenes Music (Scary/Tense) Music (Inappropriate) Profanity Heavy Minor Extreme Minor Mild Sex/ Nudity Smoking Tense Family Scenes Topics To Talk About Violence Moderate None Moderate Moderate Extreme NOTE: The following is an unedited version of our final review that may contain spelling, grammatical, and/or factual errors. Paramount Pictures did not screen this film in advance for reviewers. QUICK TAKE: Action: An elite military squad tries to stop an arms supplier and his ruthless organization from unleashing chaos and destruction on the world via nanotechnology that eats through anything it touches or infects. PLOT: Coming from a long line of arms dealers, MARS Industries CEO James McCullen (CHRISTOPHER ECCLESTON) has arranged to sell a number of warheads to NATO, but these aren't the normal military garden variety. Instead, they contain nanotechnology -- created by his own mad scientist, Rex Lewis (JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT) -- that once activated, will quickly eat through anything they come into contact with, be that military equipment or even entire cities. Due to their volatility, they obviously need a military escort and get that from a team of U.S. Army rangers led by Duke (CHANNING TATUM) and Ripcord (MARLON WAYANS). Little do any of them know, however, that they're going to be attacked by forces working directly for McCullen, or that the likes of Ana DeCobray (SIENNA MILLER), ninja Storm Shadow (BYUNG-HUN LEE) and Zartan (ARNOLD VOSLOO) will outmatch them due to technologically advanced weaponry and a similarly equipped flying craft. In fact, they probably would have lost the case of those four nanotechnology warheads to Ana's team if not for the rescue efforts of General Hawk (DENNIS QUAID) who's sent his G.I. Joe forces to fend off the villains. They're the best of the best of the various military forces, and it's not long before Duke and Ripcord are inducted into that elite force. With the U.S. President (JONATHAN PRYCE) hoping they succeed, they take their place alongside other members of the team including the alluring but tough Scarlett (RACHEL NICHOLS), ninja Snake Eyes (RAY PARK) and technology expert Breaker (SAID TAGHMAOUI). When McCullen's goons get their hands on the four warheads, it's up to Duke and the rest of the G.I. Joe specialist to prevent them from being deployed upon the world, a quest complicated by the fact that Duke and Ana once were romantically involved. WILL KIDS WANT TO SEE IT? It's a good bet many younger boys will, especially if they're fans of anything to do with the G.I Joe product line. Older kids might be interested for the action and/or if they're fans of anyone in the cast. WHY THE MPAA RATED IT: PG-13 For strong sequences of action violence and mayhem throughout. CAST AS ROLE MODELS: CHANNING TATUM plays a soldier who always wants to be on the ground, in the middle of the battle, and gets his wish when he ends up joining Gen. Hawk's team as an elite military warrior. He's conflicted, however, while battling McCullen's goons since Ana was once his (Duke's) fiancée. Even so, he's good at what he does. He uses some profanity. MARLON WAYANS plays his fellow soldier who really wants to become a pilot, but follows his buddy in joining the elite G.I. Joe team where he proves himself as a valuable addition. He playfully hits on Scarlett and uses some profanity when not battling the various villains. CHRISTOPHER ECCLESTON plays the CEO of an arms manufacturer who's corrupt and has an odious scheme he's hoping to enact. He's responsible for many deaths. SIENNA MILLER plays one of his lieutenants, a woman who was once Duke's fiancée but now is a highly trained killer who wants to get her hands on the nanotechnology warheads to help her boss enact his plan. JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT plays her brother, once Duke's friend and fellow soldier who was badly wounded in a military operation in the past only to become a mad scientist type working for McCullen but harboring his own megalomaniacal plans. BYUNG-HUN LEE plays a ninja who works for McCullen and kills many people while repeatedly battling his good counterpart who's played by RAY PARK. RACHEL NICHOLS plays an alluring but quite capable member of the G.I. Joe team who must put up with Ripcord hitting on her. SAID TAGHMAOUI plays the team's technology expert who helps them track the missing warheads. DENNIS QUAID plays the U.S. military general who's in charge of the G.I. Joe team and wants them to stop McCullen and his plane. JONATHAN PRYCE plays the President of the U.S. who wants the same thing. ARNOLD VOSLOO plays another of McCullen's deadly goons. CAST, CREW, & TECHNICAL INFO HOW OTHERS RATED THIS MOVIE Curious if this title is entertaining, any good, and/or has any artistic merit? Then read OUR TAKE of this film. (Note: The "Our Take" review of this title examines the film's artistic merits and does not take into account any of the possibly objectionable material listed below). OUR WORD TO PARENTS: The following is a brief summary of the content found in this action flick that's been rated PG-13. Profanity consists of at least 3 "s" words, while other expletives and colorful phrases are also uttered. Some brief sexual innuendo is present, as are varying amounts of cleavage (sometimes a lot), women in form-fitting & skintight outfits, and brief passionate kissing. Violence consists of many people being killed by a wide variety of means, others presumably being injured, all sorts of military action featuring futuristic weaponry resulting in lots of property damage, and many scenes of fighting, including with hard blows. Some of that has fairly bloody and/or gory results, and those scenes and moments of peril might be unsettling and/or suspenseful to some viewers (mostly younger ones). That fighting, other action and various stunts might be enticing for kids to imitate, while all of the villains obviously have bad attitudes. There's brief drinking and brief tense family material. Should you still be concerned about the film's appropriateness for yourself or anyone else in your home, you may want to look more closely at our detailed listings for more specific information regarding the film's content. For those concerned with bright flashes of light on the screen, there's some of that in one scene that briefly hits partial strobe intensity. For those prone to visually induced motion sickness, there's bouncy camera movement from time to time in the film. ALCOHOL OR DRUG USE We see a needle go into Ripcord's arm with some sort of pain killer relief that he deems good. Miscellaneous people drink in the background of a flashback scene. BLOOD/GORE We see a needle go into Ripcord's arm with some sort of pain killer relief that he deems good. For those infected with Rex's mind and body control substance, we see small, pulsating wounds back behind their ears (in several scenes). To prove his mind and body control substance works (resulting in no fear, pain, remorse, etc.), Rex has a test subject place his arm into a terrarium of sorts containing a large cobra. The snake strikes and sinks its fangs into the man's arm, but we then see an inside view of his bloodstream and such where nanotechnology attacks the venom and forces it back out of his body (we see some liquid run from the two small holes). Zartan drives a blade up through a female worker (it comes out through something she's holding in front of her chest -- with a little blood on that). Gen. Hawk has some blood on his chest following an attack. We see a little blood on Storm Shadow's sword blade. Scarlett has various cuts and such on various parts of her body following a battle. We see some blood on young Snake Eyes in a flashback. Duke has some bloody cuts on his face following an explosion. A dead man's face is bloody and large "needles" are then jammed into both sides of his head to try to access his memory before his brain stops fully functioning. But just then his face starts to sink and then disintegrate from nano particles eating up that part of his body until there's just a pulpy mess left. Storm Shadow has some blood on his face, as does Ana. Rex reveals his badly scared face and head to Duke (from a past explosion). In a flashback, Rex watches video playback of an experiment where a man's face starts to disintegrate from nano particles eating that. We see various cuts on Storm Shadow's torso and head as he battles Snake Eyes, followed by bloody cuts on his legs after he's sliced there as well. McCullen's face is badly burned, blistered and bloody after flames get him there. Rex inserts a needle into McCullen's neck, causing him pain and then his face to distort into some sort of metal surface. DISRESPECTFUL/BAD ATTITUDE McCullen is an arms manufacturer who supplies weaponry to all sides, and is plotting a scheme that will give him ultimate power via Rex's scientific applications). He's responsible for many deaths, which is also true for his subordinates including Rex, Ana, Storm Shadow, Zartan and many others. We learn that one of McCullen's ancestors sold arms to the enemy in 1641 France. Ana passionately kisses her husband (both clothed and standing), with Storm Shadow then impaling that husband in the back (heard but not seen), killing him (Ana is in on that plan). We see a flashback to Snake Eyes racing to his master, only to find a sword in his back, courtesy of Storm Shadow who's now running away. We see a flashback view to Ana being grabbed and injected with Rex's materials to make her his slave (he says for her own good). FRIGHTENING SCENES Scenes listed under "Violence," "Blood/Gore" and "Jump Scenes" may be unsettling, suspenseful or scary to younger viewers and/or those with low tolerance levels for such material. For those afraid of snakes: To prove his mind and body control substance works (resulting in no fear, pain, remorse, etc.), Rex has a test subject place his arm into a terrarium of sorts containing a large cobra. The snake strikes and sinks its fangs into the man's arm, but we then see an inside view of his bloodstream and such where nanotechnology attacks the venom and forces it back out of his body (we see some liquid run from the two small holes). For those afraid of such rodents: We see a flashback to young Snake Eyes being a street kid who picks up a rat by its tail while looking through a trashcan. A dead man's face is bloody and large "needles" are then jammed into both sides of his head to try to access his memory before his brain stops fully functioning. But just then his face starts to sink and then disintegrate from nano particles eating up that part of his body until there's just a pulpy mess left. Some younger viewers may worry when three rockets are launched carrying the "eat everything" nanotechnology. One is destroyed, but Ripcord must then fly after the remaining two to prevent them from reaching and destroying Moscow and Washington, D.C. Ripcord's missile destroys the last rocket and he barely pulls up in time to avoid hitting the White House. As the nano particles eat away his jet, he tries to climb high into the atmosphere to render them harmless to anything else on Earth. Scarlett worries when she loses contact with his craft, but he's okay. Scarlett and Breaker try to avoid icy water that's quickly flooding an underwater facility. Duke drives his sub up through a vertical tunnel that's filled with explosions, barely getting out. GUNS/WEAPONS Handguns/Machine guns/Futuristic weapons/Missiles/Rockets/Grenades/Other Explosives/Various ninja weapons (swords, nunchuckas, throwing stars, etc.)/Tanks/Attack choppers/Jet Fighters: Carried and/or used to threaten, wound or kill others and/or cause property damage. See "Violence" for details. Various guards carry spears in a scene set in 1641 France. We see part of a 21-gun salute at a funeral. IMITATIVE BEHAVIOR Phrases: "Oh sh*t," a partially silenced "Ape-sh*t" (the last part isn't heard in full), "All right, ladies, mount up," "C'mon, dude," "What the hell is/was that?" an incomplete "Holy..." "Stand the hell down," "Sure as hell," "Outstanding," "A whole hell of a lot," "Got your ass kicked," "Bastards," "Say yes, you idiot," "Egg-head," "Hell no," "Some freaky little deadly genius," "The hell with it," "One tough bastard," "That/You son of a bitch," "My bad," "That redhead is really starting to piss me off," "Bloody hell," "We are screwed," "Nice going, slick," "Bust a cap," "You better get the hell out of there" and "Damn, we look good." All of the fighting, action and other stunts might be enticing for kids to imitate. We see a miscellaneous tattoo. JUMP SCENES Zartan drives a blade up through a female worker (it comes out through something she's holding in front of her chest -- with a little blood on that). MUSIC (SCARY/TENSE) An extreme amount of action-oriented, heavily dramatic and some suspenseful music plays in the film. MUSIC (INAPPROPRIATE) A song in the end credits silences the "s" word in the lyric, "Girls go ape-sh*t." Other such words might be also be present. PROFANITY At least 3 "s" words (with at least 1 more replaced with silence in a song during the end credits), 11 hells, 5 damns, 2 asses (1 used with "hole"), 2 S.O.B.s, 1 crap, 6 uses of "Oh my God" and 1 use each of "G-damn," "Jesus" and "Oh God." SEX/NUDITY We see some shirtless men in a scene set in 1641 France. Ana shows cleavage just about every time she's seen (sometimes a lot). Scarlett shows lots of cleavage in a tank-top. In a virtual meeting where Ana really isn't there, she suggestively tells McCullen that if she were, she'd really let him touch her. After Storm Shadow says he's been ordered to kill Ana's husband if he touches her again, she playfully says that Daniel is her husband and of course he touches her. She then adds that work at his lab goes better after they've "touched." Ripcord comes on to Scarlett during training, telling her that when there's a target in his sight, "I take it down." He points downward while saying that, meant as playful innuendo on his part, while she replies that some targets are hard to take down (referring to herself). Ripcord refers to her (to Duke) as "some freaky little deadly genius." We see Duke and Ripcord shirtless while training, while Scarlett shows some cleavage while running on a treadmill in her sports bra. We see Ana in a skintight leather sort of outfit that shows off/accentuates her curves. We briefly see Duke shirtless. Ana passionately kisses her husband (both clothed and standing), with Storm Shadow then impaling that husband in the back (heard but not seen), killing him (Ana is in on that plan). McCullen and Ana passionately kiss (clothed and standing). We see split-second flashback views of Duke and Ana kissing. While the men are also in formfitting armor (that creates non-realistic looking muscles on the chest plates), Scarlett's body armor accentuates her breasts in their natural shape. Scarlett kisses Ripcord before he takes flight. Duke and Ana passionately kiss (clothed and upright). We see a flashback view to Ana lying sideways on a bed in her tank top and panties (only a partial view of the latter). We see Storm Shadow shirtless as he battles Snake Eyes. Ana and Duke passionately kiss while clothed. SMOKING None. TENSE FAMILY SCENES We learn that Duke and Ana were once engaged, but that later events called off the marriage. We see Ana grieving at her brother's funeral (but we know that he's alive in the present day). Ana's husband is shocked to see her true motives as she orders that he uses his lab equipment to activate McCullen's nanotechnology warheads. Ana passionately kisses her husband (both clothed and standing), with Storm Shadow then impaling that husband in the back (heard but not seen), killing him (Ana is in on that plan). TOPICS TO TALK ABOUT The use of nanotechnology in science as well as military applications. The history of the G.I. Joe product line. The comment that when you get knocked down, you get back up again. McCullen states that the secret to being an arms dealer is never getting caught dealing to both sides. VIOLENCE A complete metal mask is pulled from the flames and then placed onto the face of McCullen's ancestor to scar him permanently (we hear him scream, but don't see the results). We see a nanotechnology test where the material is fired onto a tank where the metal on it is quickly devoured. We also see a non-realistic, computer simulation of the same happening to buildings in a city. Ana and her team attack Duke and his when the latter are escorting McCullen's warheads. Ana's small flying craft shoots down one military helicopter and it falls onto a transport vehicle, while another chopper fires machine guns and missiles at the craft, but they do it no harm. It then shoots that chopper and another while also firing on the ground vehicles and army personnel. Massive amounts of bullets and such are fired back, but to no avail, with the truck Duke and Ripcord are in being knocked over by an explosion. As Duke carries Ripcord to safety, a large ground battle takes place, with machine guns fired, hand grenades thrown, and some sort of pulse weapon fired by the villains that knocks soldiers backwards (we don't know their fates). Hand to hand combat also occurs, with Ana kicking Duke, a ninja slices several people, and Duke stabs one person. Scarlett also blasts some and a device she fired goes up into the air when she's knocked down and then comes around and lands in a villain's mask eyehole where it then explodes. A plane fires a huge machine gun at Ana on the ground, while her craft fires several shots at the plane that barely avoids being hit. The villains get away and Duke briefly has a gun standoff with the G.I. Joe team, while Snake Eyes holds his sword on Ripcord. We see Duke and Ripcord going through G.I. Joe training that includes martial arts practice fighting (with various blows to them), and various weapons fired, including in underwater sub-like craft where targets are destroyed. To prove his mind and body control substance works (resulting in no fear, pain, remorse, etc.), Rex has a test subject place his arm into a terrarium of sorts containing a large cobra. The snake strikes and sinks its fangs into the man's arm, but we then see an inside view of his bloodstream and such where nanotechnology attacks the venom and forces it back out of his body (we see some liquid run from the two small holes). Storm Shadow slices one person off camera, but we then see them fall into the shot. Zartan drives a blade up through a female worker (it comes out through something she's holding in front of her chest -- with a little blood on that), prompting Gen. Hawk to punch him and then try to avoid Storm Shadow who ends up knocking him out with his blade. There's a gun battle in the G.I. Joe command center, with people being hit and killed on both sides, while various explosions also go off with similar results. During this, Ripcord drives one a forklift into one villain, impaling him (we see part of the blade come through the surface against which the man has been pushed), while Storm Shadow slices several (that's followed by a flashback to Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes battling in a flashback). Ana and Scarlett fight, with various martial arts blows and such, while elsewhere a grenade is placed on a villain who's on fire and his head explodes (not seen in full). Another is blown back and electrocuted, while Storm Shadow slices another and Scarlett activates a device that makes her invisible and allows her to hit Ana repeatedly. The latter, however, eventually gets the upper hand, throwing something that hits Scarlett on the head before repeatedly punching her. Duke also hits someone, and they fall a long way. We see a non-graphic side view of a dead man in the desert with a blade sticking out of his body. We see a flashback to young Storm Shadow and young Snake Eyes battling, with all sorts of martial arts blows and such (including a non-traditional head-butt). We see Zartan getting Rex's cobra treatment, with needles injected into his head, causing him pain and his face to distort. We see a flashback to a military battle where Duke, Ripcord and others provide cover (firing machines while the same are fired back at them) for Rex to enter a building to find something. But a called-in airstrike arrives too soon, and Duke ends up being blown backwards as he runs toward the building that explodes with Rex (and another man) still inside. Storm Shadow flings throwing stars into several people and shoots another, killing all of them. Ana passionately kisses her husband (both clothed and standing), with Storm Shadow then impaling that husband in the back (heard but not seen), killing him (Ana is in on that plan). The G.I. Joe team pursues Ana, Storm Shadow and others in the latter's heavily armored vehicle. Duke and Ripcord are in "accelerator suits" that allow them to run much faster and jump much higher than normal, and a car slams into Ripcord in his before he's used to how it works (he's uninjured). During the subsequent, multi-minute chase, many extraneous vehicles are hit by the villain's SUV and/or crash into others, resulting in standard crashes, others with flipping vehicles, and a few explosions. Duke and Ripcord must avoid all of that while on foot, and they fire their arm-mounted machine guns at the truck, but to no avail, while Snake Eyes ends up on top and tries firing his handgun through the roof, but the bullets only dent the armor. He then drives his sword through the roof while the driver smashes another vehicle, sending it over the top with Snake Eyes having to flip over it. He then ends up battling Storm Shadow along the side of the SUV, with the driver then sideswiping other vehicles to try to scrape him off. He end up holding on beneath the moving SUV, and as a man leans out to shoot down at him, Scarlett fires a device that hits his head and causes that to explode (not seen in full), with his body then hitting the road. A missile is fired at the SUV that then fires missiles back at Duke and Ripcord, but they flip and careen their bodies to avoid being hit (with explosions all around them), but another blast sends them smacking back into a building. Duke eventually ends up in front of the truck that pushes him along the road, his boots digging trenches into the pavement. The driver tries to smash him into another vehicle and he must avoid that as it flips up over the top. Right after Snake Eyes leaves the underside of the vehicle, a commuter train smashes into the SUV, causing it to flip and explode, while Duke and Ripcord can't stop in time and end up blasting through the side of the train (glass shattering, etc.) and smash into and bounce along parked cars before coming to a stop. Ana shoves some people aside and fires warning shots into the air with her machine gun. She then fires shots at Ripcord inside an open-air building, blasting and shattering all sorts of glass. She then uses some sort of pulse blaster to knock Duke through various walls and then out of the building (he grabs a hold of the side). He then gets back in and races toward Storm Shadow, tackling him through a wall too late after the latter's missile has been fired through a window and at the Eiffel Tower. Storm Shadow's missile hits the Eiffel Tower, with its nanotechnology substance quickly eating through the metal base as well as several nearby vehicles. The team manages to deactivate that, but the damage has been done and the tower collapses onto a nearby bridge, presumably killing or at least wounding many people. A blast knocks Duke backwards, while Storm Shadow hits Ripcord and then jumps through a window, shattering the glass. After Duke jumps into their transport craft, Storm Shadow knocks him out. A local cop hits Ripcord while arresting him. We see a flashback to Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow sparring with various weapons (poles, nunchuckas, etc.), with Snake Eyes eventually winning. We later hear the sound of a murder and Snake Eyes races to their master, only to find a sword in his back, courtesy of Storm Shadow who's now running away. While cuffed, Duke grabs a large case and hits some guards with it before trying to flee. Storm Shadow flings a throwing star into Duke, downing him, followed by others repeatedly striking him, including with the butts of their weapons. Duke head-butts McCullen, followed by the latter's goons repeatedly hitting Duke (heard more than seen). Two guards are shot. Ripcord fires a smaller missile into a larger rocket, destroying the latter. Rex prepares to have various automated needles enter Duke's head, but Ana hits her brother over the head instead. That's followed by a standoff with Duke aiming his gun at Rex who holds a device that will kill Ana due to what's previously been planted in her body. McCullen then tries to shoot flames at Duke, but the latter fires back, causing the CEO's face to be burned badly. We see a flashback view to Ana being grabbed and injected with Rex's materials to make her his slave. Snake Eyes stabs his knife into a control panel to deactivate it. There's an underwater battle where submarines of sorts fire upon each other as well as on McCullen's immense underwater lair. That includes the equivalent of underwater machine guns as well as explosions. A large pulse cannon hits the main G.I. Joe sub, damaging it and imperiling the lives of hundreds inside. Scarlett shoots various villains while Snake Eyes slices others. Ripcord shoots another rocket, destroying it. A Secret Service agent, under McCullen's control, shoots three fellow agents dead. Snake Eyes kicks, shoots and flings throwing stars into others. After Storm Shadow flings a throwing star at Snake Eyes who flings it back, the two battle, with various blows thrown, blocked or delivered. Snake Eyes ends up slicing Storm Shadow's legs before kicking him repeatedly and then stabbing him in the chest, sending him falling a long distance down into some icy water. Duke blasts various villains. Ana shoots other subs from the one in which she and Duke are seated. Ripcord's missile destroys the last rocket and he barely pulls up in time to avoid hitting the White House. As the nano particles eat away his jet, he tries to climb high into the atmosphere to render them harmless to anything else on Earth. Scarlett worries when she loses contact with his craft, but he's okay. Duke fires sub missiles at Rex's fleeing sub. One hits a metal portal door that's now closed, but the other managed to slip through and hits the back of Rex's sub, damaging it. Other subs then fire on Duke's sub, with those missiles hitting the portal door, followed by the sub crashing into the same and exploding. Duke then fires at the other sub, destroying it. Some villains are blasted. Scarlett shoots several villains. Reviewed August 7, 2009 / Posted August 7, 2009

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